I met a guy online and I chatted a bit with him for a few weeks. He finally asked me out to dinner and I said yes since he seemed really nice. After we met at the restaurant right away I knew that this date was not going to go very well since all of his topics were about him, and only him. He didn’t once ask about me. Every time I try to change the subject he’d start up again. That evening I found out how he had just been released from jail for stealing a tractor because “he needed a ride home”. Gawd. He also mentioned many times that he didn’t have a job because of this. Great. He ordered the most expensive thing off the menu and drank at least 7 beers. Finally when the check came not surprisingly he didn’t reach for it or even offer to pay for half. By this time I was so angry all I wanted to do was leave. He even wanted to go to the movies afterwards. Yeah…on my dime? Not likely. I politely told him no and to have a good evening, then he asked for a ride home. I asked him how he got to the resturant and he said that he took the bus and didn’t have any money to get home. I told him that he’d better start walking then. So many dealbreakers it was unreal.

We have arranged to go hiking, I show up at his place so he can drive us. I get in his car and see he has gauges that indicate he’s tricked out the engine. I ask him about it, he talks a little about it, then guns his engine up to 70MPH in a 35 zone. We get out onto the highway and he drives normally until anyone else with a nice car, or someone who wants to go faster than the speed limit comes near, and then he’s all gunning and swerving and breaking. He has the music turned up so loud I can hardly hear myself think much less have a conversation. I still try to ask him questions, he answers briefly and then drops the conversation.

We arrive and we start to climb, and I realize I’m in over my head about half-way up. We stop to rest, and he runs up ahead and waits for me to catch up. This happens about 4 times before we reach the top. The conversation continues to be one-sided. On the way back down he starts spitting and shooting snot-rockets to the side of the trail. Then there’s evidently some dude who’s got his shirt off, so he declares he has to compete and takes his off too. At this point I’m so turned off I don’t even look at him. He asks me who looks better.
“Of you and me?”
“Me and the guy with his shirt off.”
“I honestly didn’t even see him.”
We get back to the bottom, he asks if we can go eat grasshoppers at a local sushi restaurant. Yeah, sure, but you need to let me get my car first. So we head back and the driving gets 10x more showy and I’m no longer able to suppress the urge to scream or crawl out of my skin. I’m nearly in tears at this point, and when I get out to get in my car, I’m shaking so bad I can barely operate the keys. I fiddle with the radio for long enough to calm down a bit, then lead him out. We get to the sushi restaurant, he declares that he has $6 to his name and will get 2 grasshoppers. I order one for myself. He decides I should eat the small one. So many dealbreakers.

This guy took me to a really fancy Italian restaurant, ordered everything including an appetizer, a bottle of wine and dessert. It was really nice… I figured he was trying to impress me.

Half way through dinner, we got into this conversation about gender roles. He thought that traditional gender roles should be followed to a “t.” I’m not that kind of girl, but I was polite and changed the subject.

At the end of the meal, Mr. Gender Roles had me pay half of the 100.00 bill. I’m also unemployed… and he knew it. We had a conversation about my difficult money situation.

Dealbreaker.