Archive for July, 2009

The Older Man

I was on a second date with a guy. The first one had gone well and we had a good time. I thought he was in his 30s, but wasn’t sure of his exact age. So on the second date I asked him how old he was, and he said, oh I don’t know, 34 or 35. Of course, after hearing this shady answer I asked him to see his ID. He gave me his driver’s license and it turned out he was 42. Lying about your age? Dealbreaker.

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The Big Spender

I went on a first date with this guy and we could not decide where to go since his shift ended really late at work, so I decided Denny’s, no biggy. We talked and I ordered cheese sticks and a coke…he ate some of my cheese sticks and we had a great conversation and we laughed and it was great until he went to drop me off and parked his car in front of my apartment and ask for a kiss, I gave him a peck and he forced his tongue down my throat and when I backed off and asked what the hell he was doing his response was “I payed for your food” Yes, he payed a whole 5 bucks…never called him again. Dealbreaker.

The Quick to Cum Guy

I was dating a guy for a few weeks and we were finally going to have sex. I’m on his bed and we start making out. Before we even got a chance to take off our clothes he came. It was only like five minutes and then he rolled over and wanted to go to bed. Quick dealbreaker!!

The Skull Guy

I once met a guy at a bar who seemed pretty nice and normal. After a few drinks he invited my friends and I back to his house. We were all hanging out and eventually my friends left and I spent the night. I don’t know if it was because it was dark in his bed room, or because I was a bit tipsy, but I somehow didn’t notice a bookshelf full of his skull collection until the next morning. I got out of there quick. Deal breaker.

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The Nose Hair Guy

I was dating a guy for awhile that had a major nose hair problem. The hairs were sticking so far out of his nose that they were all I could see when I got close to kiss him. When it got to the point where I didn’t want to kiss him because of the hairs, I knew I had to say something. I casually told him that I had noticed the nose hairs and maybe he should trim them. He said, Oh yeah, I know. They are really long, huh. End of discussion. No trimming ever occurred. Neither did any more kissing. Dealbreaker.

The Speed Dialer

I met a guy at a bar one night and we really hit it off. We talked for a long time and made tentative plans to hang out the next day. He got my number before I left with my friends. The next day I got a call from an unknown number. I hoped it was him, but didn’t answer to that I could listen to the message and call him back. The message was from him, checking on our plans. Excited, I went to call him back but before I could, he called back again. I was shocked so I didn’t answer. And then he called again. And again. And again. And again. Six times in all. Dealbreaker.

The Undercover Lover

The guy that I was dating was on a role making me feel like crap for things that he did wrong, but somehow turned around on me. I finally got out of that mindset when my friends saw him make out with another girl at a concert and he completely denied it. Saying that trusted eye witnesses are liars and then finally admitting that you accidentally made out with a girl? Dealbreaker.

The Pecker

So I’m been on a couple of dates with this guy and he and I have kissed maybe a couple of times. So when we go to make out he kisses like a fish: it’s like small pecks on my lips. I finally was like what are you doing and he says, what? you don’t like to be teased? Umm kiss better dude! Dealbreaker.

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The Devil’s Three Way Guy

I was out with this guy who I really liked, and we met up with his friend, and as the night wore on it became clear than they wanted a three-way with me, which I could theoretically have been into. But they were like best friends, and they wanted to get naked together…in the same bed…? Dealbreaker.

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The Borrower

This cute guy just picked me up for our first date .  He said “I need to swing by home and get some money”. When we get there he says “I want you to meet my mom”… I thought it was early for that but I really had no choice. Then he says “Yeah, I live with my mom, go ahead and laugh”. Lame at 29, but I let it slide. We get in and he tells his mom (in front of me) that he wants to impress me and that he needs a lot of “comps”. In Vegas (where I lived) that means free dinner tickets. She gave him $30 worth but he said that wasn’t enough and he needed $30 more. They fought for a few minutes and she finally relented. THEN he told her he wanted to take me bowling after and that he needed her comp tickets for the bowling alley in the casino too. So she throws them at him. As we are leaving she says “You better have my car back by 1am–you aren’t insured to drive it and you need to be home early to go look for a job in the morning”. All that together–Dealbreaker(s)!

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